I don't think I will ever forget what it felt like to find out what happened to her by reading something on her Facebook page.  Someone had posted, "please pray for missy,  she is in the ICU after an accident in SF."  How was I supposed to react to that?  She was supposed to call me when she was on her way back from San Francisco.  I remember being confused as to why I hadn't heard from her, but just figured she was in traffic coming home, or running late, or busy with something.  Reading those words put me into an absolute state of terror. My body ceased to function and I collapsed to the ground in a hysteric mix of gutteral cries and failed attempts to bring oxygen into my lungs. From that moment on my life has been in disarray.  
There are moments that I remember very clearly and others that seem like an absolute blur. Driving up to San Francisco, with Mika and Charlie, is an example of everything during that time being quite clear.  We were able to focus on those next 6 hours and solely on heading north.  Nothing else mattered at that point, only getting to her. We even remarked that she would be in the car with us doing the same thing. There was no doubt in our mind that she would have jumped in the car and done exactly what we were doing.   For many illogical reasons, many people told us not to go, but nothing was stopping me from going to her. Nothing. I would have gone to the farthest corner of the globe for her, a little 6 hour drive was not going to stop me. The drive was not entirely somber either, we found ourselves laughing and listening to music.  We spent time focusing on the task at hand.  Simply getting to San Francisco.  When it became real though, too real, was when we drove into the city and passed St. Lukes Hospital. That was when I had my second break down.