Open Letter to Wells Fargo

I hate you.  So when a charge to my account for 120 dollars is fraudulent you decide to accept my claim but don't tell me until after that you will have to cancel my card and send me a new one.  That would be great but I AM IN ANOTHER COUNTRY and have NO OTHER ACCESS TO DINERO.   And to the woman helping me on the phone, who knew my whereabouts, I say to you this, thank you.  For being so kind and understanding. That was fabulous how you kept that secret until the very end of our relationship.  I could just see you sitting there in your little cubicle giggling to yourself as you withheld this information.  You are a covert angel of frustration, and for that I thank you.  And thank you for thanking me for doing business with Wells Fargo.  That was a nice touch.  With that, I am off to burn my debit card, as it is no use to me anymore.  I will take joy in watching the card shrivel up and disperse into nothingness.